What are the programs behind narcissism, and where did it begin? The secret may be in our DNA.
Where Does Narcissism Come From?
If you have had to deal with someone who has a personality disorder, or even narcissism, have you ever wondered where the programs behind narcissism come from?
Modern psychology tells us that narcissism is developed from an essential wound in early life from age 7 onwards, and usually installs itself as a result of neglectful or bad parenting.
The young person involved never gets an opportunity to grow a sense of self, and grows their awareness from the outside in as a survival instinct. The ego becomes distorted in an attempt to replace the growth of the Self.
The person with narcissistic personality disorder then has a ‘black hole’ of need. This must be filled by other people’s energetic supply. This can be through attention, interaction, any kind of focus.
But What If Narcissism Comes From Our DNA?
In this article from PsychCentral, this government study was cited.
Genetics may also play a role in contributing to narcissistic personality disorder.
In a 2014 studyTrusted Source, involving 304 pairs of twins, researchers found that some NPD traits were somewhat heritable (aka able to be passed on through genetics):
Grandiosity was 23% heritable
Entitlement was 35% heritable
Still, these traits seemed to exist independently from each other.
Older research indicates that NPD could be slightly more heritable than other cluster B personality disorders.
Personality traits may also play a role in how NPD presents.
When we are born, we enter into a neurological matrix of family, social, and cultural behaviors. This matrix influences us.
We have to learn to fit in to be a part of society and survive.
Each family also has a preset emotional, mental, acoustic, and sensory set of tones that can influence a child.
In fact, as soon as we are developing in utero, our mother’s emotional state influences us too.
DNA Is No Longer Seen As An Unchangeable Factor In Inheritance
In the past, DNA was viewed as an immovable inheritance. What we got from our parents could not be changed or influenced in any way.
Through the study of Epigenetics (Dr. Bruce Lipton), we are beginning to understand that both emotional tone and energetic atmosphere can contribute to switching genetic factors both off and on during childhood. This includes factors that were previously thought to be fixed in place.
One example Dr. Bruce Lipton cites is a child who contracted the same rare cancer that both his parents did. This happened even though he was adopted and not from their bloodline, and had no genetic markers indicating that he was vulnerable to that disease type.
So, of course, it’s entirely possible that someone with no previously indicated genetic traits for NPD could become narcissistic after bad treatment in childhood.
NPD Can Also Be Inherited Through Parental Ancestry
My ex’s family has all sorts of unusual influences, which could potentially cause NPD to be switched on genetically.
Many of us could raise a hand and say our parents had it tough. Both of my parents had neglectful or abusive parents or step-parents.
Yet my mother retained her compassion despite being treated terribly and was kind to us.
My dad struggled more with that…but he was a 50s man, so, as my Human Design Mentor often says to me, emotions weren’t invented for men until at least the ’70s. (That is meant to make you laugh, by the way.)
My dad was kind to me, but was triggered by my brother. He saw so much of himself in his son. Suppressed trauma can often be triggered when a child reaches the same age at which the trauma occurred for the parent.
My Ex’s Family History – Some Programs Behind Narcissism
In my ex’s family, several extenuating circumstances could lead to NPD: –
#1 – Military Background
My ex’s grandfather traveled the world and was in both the Royal Navy and the US Coast Guard.
He didn’t marry my ex’s mother until he was 65 — she was mid-twenties. The marriage didn’t last long.
They lived next door and co-parented their two kids after that.
One of my theories was that this grandfather was a gay man trying to fit into a non-accepting paradigm. (Being gay was life-threatening in those days, and you could go to prison.) But I will most likely never know the truth.
#2 – Unaddressed PTSD
My ex’s father was a Vietnam Vet and didn’t talk much about his service.
Once, he told me a bunch, but that is when I was massaging his feet (reflexology). Trauma will begin to ‘purge’ then.
I’m quite sure he suffered from undiagnosed PTSD as a result of his experiences in service. Not much was known about that when he left the military.
#3 Abandonment in Childhood
My ex’s father was abandoned by his parents and raised by some Uncles and a female servant on a farm. It was a fairly basic upbringing.
#4 Childhood Trauma
My ex’s mother clearly had childhood trauma, but refused to talk about any of it because she was ashamed.
The closest she got to it was telling me that her mother ran a boarding house and that it wasn’t a safe space for a child. The inference was pretty clear.
#5 Physical Abuse
Both my ex’s parents believed in whipping their children with a belt when they misbehaved (e.g., broke a rule).
It was a hard enough whipping given each time that my ex told me when he got older and was whipped, he would bite his cheek so as not to cry.
#6 Arguments, Fisticuffs, No Boundaries
Both parents would argue loudly and ferociously during every family visit I attended. They would slam things around, and neither ever showed any awareness of good boundaries when I knew them.
Talk would cover everything, including the latest sex they had, in front of everyone, including the grandkids. My kids were scared of them. It was all pretty toxic.
#7 – Brutally Enforced Standards
Military-level cleanliness and standards when doing chores were a prerequisite in my ex’s house as a child. If not kept up, this resulted in some kind of punishment.
I could add even more to this list. You can probably see from this pattern that there was a lot of pre-socialization around stuffing feelings, fitting in, and not being allowed to express the true self in my ex’s family line.
There was love and commitment displayed too, of course, but most of what went on always had a dangerous undertone of it’s gonna blow any minute if you don’t do as I say, just like a volcano, even on family social visits.
So, genetic ancestry markers can be switched on or off, and affect the future outcome of a child’s emotional well-being with a family history like this. This kind of background could result in someone having a personality disorder like NPD.
Genetic Karma
In the Akashic Records (our Records of Past Lives) I call this Genetic Karma.
Using this method, it’s possible to see where problems may have started through the genetic inheritance. Energetic programs can be identified during the process, Chaos being the most common indicator of one of the programs behind narcissism.
If grandiosity is 23% heritable, and entitlement is 35% heritable, then narcissistic behavior may have been passed down a family line, too.
In the past, grandiosity and entitlement were behaviors often encouraged in men so that they could survive and support their families.
World leaders throughout the centuries have had to be both grandiose and entitled, or they wouldn’t have hung onto their thrones or positions of power for long.
Now women in the West have their couverture back. This means ownership of themselves as a valid legal body and the ability to enter marriages without a dowry.
It’s time to start wiping the now unhelpful and restrictive programs of narcissism out of our family lines.
